don't go changing
by extraordinaire
Summary: SasuSaku/ItaIno. "Oh Sakura, you're just so flexible." Because their friendship isn't based off of make-up and boys, but rather strange Facebook holidays and the occasional sex song.


_don't go changing_

for Meg  
(MY Ino)

* * *

"So the other day—you know, when I went home early because I was sick and like, gross and whatever—I got home and was laying in bed. It was one of those moments when you were in between consciousness and deliriousness, but like, you're never really sure."

Sakura shook her head, because she knew she could relate to what her best friend was talking about. I mean, those crazy Mexicans that speak to her in the morning are obviously because she's temporarily not awake—or sane.

"Right, so like, I was sitting there looking at my hands, and thinking, "When do people wash their hands?" and I was like, "Psh, whenever they feel like it!""

The pinkette nodded again. "Like, seriously, who washes their hands when they _don't_ want to?"

"EXACTLY! But anyways, yeah, so then I thought that it would make a really cool song."

"Whenever I feel like it?"

Ino's hands flailed, showing that she was very excited about it. "Like, isn't that amazing? I even had some lyrics in my head, but I didn't write them down since I was kind of, like, not with it in the head."

"Yeah, _that's_ nothing new." Sakura retorted under her breath, but Ino caught it and hit her.

She then ran her hand through her pin-straight, Barbie-like hair that Sakura didn't really envy, because sometimes it got curly, and it looked _horrible_. "Like, seriously, I know the lyrics. And the chorus would be like, "When I feel like it!" And then, all of the sudden, someone would scream, "NOW!""

"God, that sounds so perverted. It's like, the epitome of perversion."

Ino rolled her eyes. "Epitome, Sakura? That's like, so last year. Everyone says apotheosis now."

"Ino, you probably looked that up like a total loser." Ino got a nervous look on her face. "Holy crap, Ino, you're such a loser! Just because I casually sprinkle big words in conversation that you don't know doesn't mean that you should go and Wikipedia new words just to sound smart."

"Yeah, well, um—at least I don't Wikipedia KISSING!"

The pink-haired girl flushed, her blush comparable to her unusual hair. "Could you shut up? There are people around here. And I only did that because it would be funny if someone did. You just keep reminding me about it, just like you did with the putting my hand in the pot of boiling water!"

"Dude, you put a finger…in a pot of boiling water. How do I NOT make fun of that?"

Sakura stumbled on her words, trying to deliver an adequate come-back, but she really couldn't, so she turned to English Class—because that's just what she does. "Why must you _bereft_ me of a normal life?"

"God, why do you always have to _augment_ things?"

Sakura sighed. "I'm going to have to _deploy_ a good come-back, but it'll not _adulterate_ our view on English class, just like you have done with your _dour_ remarks! Why are you so freaking _ambidextrous_?"

"Dude, you just totally used _ambidextrous_ wrong. We all know that I only use one hand."

Sakura gasped. "Goodness, didn't you do the vocab homework? It said that ambidextrous could mean deceitful, or even hypocritical."

"Geez, there's no need to _gape_ at me like that. I have such great _fortitude_, that I won't even give any _intimation_ that I'm really _tentative_ about the homework tonight, so I'm just going to be _stolid_ and not act _warily_! Beat that, bitch!"

"Yeah, well, I will ignore your _gibes_, because I can see through you're _guise_! I know about your _insidious_ plan, so I'll just continue on with my _opulent_ life while you remain _unkempt_."

The blonde stuck out her tongue. "Gosh, how many times must I _reiterate_ this? Do I really have to _verbatim_ this conversation? I mean, um…how do I use _pliable_?"

Sakura looked up, confusion invading her mind as well. "Well, it means flexible so…"

"Oh Sakura, you're just so _flexible_."

"I know, but I wish I was _experienced_ as you."

They giggled together, quickly getting over their battle because they used up all the vocab words for this week, and that's just how the rolled. One minute discussing sex songs, then next reciting English vocab—they were in Honors for a _reason_—and finally using pick-up lines on each other, because both were just so _sexy_.

"Do I want to know why you two are laughing like that?" A voice asked from behind. Ino immediately straightened up while Sakura rolled her eyes, because she knew that any appearance of The Boyfriend would cause her to pretty herself up.

But when she saw her own boyfriend come into view next to Itachi, she smiled at him, waiting for him to come to her side. And when Sasuke wrapped his fingers around her own, she blushed a pretty pink.

Sakura and Sasuke weren't as public about their relationship as Ino and Itachi where, made evident by the make-out scene that was occurring in front of their innocent eyes.

"So what are you doing here?" Sasuke asked, trying to ignore the moans coming from his left.

Sakura grinned, happy about not having to see her best friend swap saliva with another guy, and the fact that Sasuke was starting conversation with her. "Oh, Ino and I stayed after school to get ready for that social studies test tomorrow. Why are you here?"

He shrugged. "Naruto was staying after to try out for Konoha Idol and asked me to watch, so then Itachi stayed because he was annoying. But Naruto is still waiting, and I saw you, so I left him."

"Aw! Poor Naru-chan! But it's okay, since you saw me, and that just makes you really sweet." He smirked that delicious smirk while squeezing her hand tighter, causing her to swoon at unsafe measures.

They waited a few more seconds before the couple near them broke up, Sakura uttering the words, "God Ino, you're such a whore."

"That's not what you said last night…" Ino retorted, and Sakura wouldn't help but grin.

Itachi raised his eyebrows at this, though it wasn't uncommon behavior for the two, and pointed out, "You two have quite colorful mouths."

"Oh, Sakura would know how colorful my mouth is."

"Yeah, with all those moans coming out, and all the tongues. It's such a tangled mess of love that's displayed on your _large_ bed."

Ino winked. "I know. My parents asked me what kind of bed I should get, and I just knew that you'd be visiting at night—you know, _the usual routine_—so I made sure to get one that was big and comfy, so you could _enjoy_ your stay."

Sakura flipped her hand toward her bestie, as if ready to state the obvious when she said, "Oh, I _always_ enjoy my stay when it involves you and me in a large bed…_naked_."

"Can you two _shut up_?" Sasuke asked venomously.

"Aw, baby, don't get so jealous of _her_." Sakura comforted.

"Why are you two doing this anyway?" The older Uchiha asked with confusion.

"Psh, it's _Be Sexually Inappropriate With Your Friend Day_ on Facebook!"

Sakura's eyes lit up. "Oh, that's my _favorite_ holiday."

"I know! I just _love_ what you wear! Or well, what you _don't_ wear."

Sasuke was almost boiling with irritation, so he commanded, "Could you two freaking _shut the hell up_?"

"Sasu-chan, I'm sorry. Would a kiss make it better?" And before he could answer with a nod of the head—because we all know that Sasuke is a horny bastard who can't resist a kiss from The One—she wrapped her arms around his neck, engulfing his cold lips in a warm kiss.

Ino rolled her eyes while her boyfriend glanced over at her. "Why would it matter if it's a holiday on Facebook? You guys do that every day."

"Oh, I know, but like, My Homie G Sakura and I happen to have a lot of holiday spirit! We're kind of just _that_ cool."

Sakura broke away from the kiss and leaned her head against Sasuke chest, half leaning on him. "Dude, you know what would make this holiday just so _complete_?"

"What?" Ino asked, she leaning against her own boyfriend, because her heels hurt and she knew that her boyfriend would always help her in these types of situations.

A large grin cracked onto her face. "We should go to my house, and pour ourselves some hot chocolate. With MARSHMALLOWS!"

"Holy crap, marshmallows that you jostle in your mouth?"

Sakura smiled, encouraging her. "Yeah! Ones that are nice and soft that you can just nip at in your mouth! Sometimes they're just too big, but we always manage when we squeeze such a large item into our small mouths!"

"I know! And the taste is just so delicious. Not only are the fluffy and nice to touch, but they're just so nice to _suck on_."

The pink-haired girl nodded with extra enthusiasm. "I would just like to suck on them all day!"

"…who's marshmellows?" Sasuke asked dully, though his girlfriend could see through his stolid display of calmness.

Both girls smiled. "Well, let's think. They're really white—you know, _pale_—and they're so nice and soft, oh, and we also kind of _love_ them."

Itachi rolled his eyes while placing an arm around the blonde next to him. "So you like to suck on me?"

"Psh, of course not! I like to suck on _Sakura_!"

Sasuke growled, wrapping his own arm around his girlfriend while both gals giggled.

"I'm sorry Sasuke. I didn't know I was causing such chicanery."

Sakura gaped. "God, did you look up _another_ word?"

Ino looked down, almost ashamed of her nerdiness. "Um…_maybe_."

"Do I even want to know?" Itachi asked.

Sakura smiled, glancing at Ino.

Because they knew that the friendship they had just wasn't able to be comprehended by anyone—especially their dimwitted boyfriends (but they truly weren't stupid, because they did pick _them_ as their girlfriends).

They're friendship was full of twists and turns, involving claiming random guys, and even the occasional comparison about who's better—Evan Mendez of Jessica Simpson. Sometimes, there were pointless conversations, and on occasion, the making of some serious Mac-N-Cheese.

But no matter what they did, and no matter how many times they celebrated Facebook holidays, or even how Ishbu would get in the way of their _nightly routines_, they both knew that nothing could tear them apart.

* * *

(**BEWARE**! long _author's note_ ahead)

Um…this is kind of what happened to me today. Ish. I don't have a hot boyfriend, and neither does my friend Meaghan. But we're still freaking chill, because we have English battles, and acted _sexually inappropriate_ with each other. And the title—to which Meaghan said it was nerdy—is based of off what we say when we finish writing in The Book (long story).

So yeah, be _jealous_.  
(I'm Sakura, and she's Ino…if ya didn't get that)

Oh, and in our school, we have American Idol, except it's the name of our school (to which I won't disclose), and like yeah. Oh, and the Ino/Itachi thing? Um…I happen to find them to be a really cute couple, so expect a lot of them stuff. NaruIno will still occur, oh AND NaruHina, but I'm just taking a break from them.

THE QUIET GIRL WILL ALWAYS GET THE GUY!  
I just like, _experimenting_.

I have five one-shots started, and even a new multi-chaptered story coming soon. I have tons of ideas for my other stories, but just no freaking time. I have like, a five day weekend coming up, so hopefully that'll be good. Yeah.

OH, AND, AND, AND,  
**Happy Birthday Ino!  
**(this one was for _you_)


End file.
